Friday, September 30, 2011

Why I'm Quitting Facebook

"Lady Looking at Drawings" by Adolpho Belimbau, 1894

... {Or maybe I should title this post "Goodbye Facebook, Hello Life!"}

It is no secret that I have loved spending time on Facebook. I am a BIGTIME social butterfly, and FB made it so very easy to not only connect, but "hang out" with some of my favorite people in the universe-- especially friends I haven't seen in ages or family members I don't get the chance to see very often.

BUT... Starting today, I am quitting, jumping ship, abandoning cyberspace, whatever you want to call it, because I need to be a big girl and LIVE MY LIFE.

For anyone who'd like me to be more specific, I give you my "Reasons Why I'm Quitting Facebook" List:


It is frightening, but true, that my house, my family, and MY CHILDREN have suffered because of all this wonderful socializing I've been doing. My children would have an easier time recognizing the back of my head in a crowd than they would know me seeing my face.

And that is, frankly, TRAGIC.

My kids are growing up, moving on, and they need a REAL MOTHER. With a face and everything.


I'm sure this will shock everyone, but I have a very addictive personality. With almost anything (well, anything pleasant) I don't hesitate-- I JUMP in with both feet!

And Facebook has been no different for me. For example, I have almost 600 friends, I have a ton of pictures posted, I change my profile picture and information at least every month, if not every week, and I feel it is my duty to comment or "Like" all of my friends' posts, pictures, links, and notes. (What if someone thinks I don't like them?!)


I am in the midst of several IMPORTANT writing projects, and I have sadly been wasting my precious, scheduled "Writing Time" hanging out on Facebook. And so the only writing that's been happening has been rushed, poorly-written blog articles. And only because of deadlines. Oops.

I have finally realized that typing LOL and {{{HUGS}}} over and over again is not really helping me improve my writing skills-- ya know?


I recently had an epiphany about Facebook itself. In the last few weeks, Facebook has changed its format-- which it does quite often.

But this recent change really frustrated me. It came right at a time when I was trying to reasonably reduce the amount of time I was wasting there, and yet the new changes were taking away my choices of what friends and stories I wanted to see. It also added a feature that showed everything that my friends were saying, commenting on, posting to OTHER friends-- people I do not know.

The privacy issues at Facebook are now more intrusive than ever. And with all the "Friends" I have on Facebook, I have neither the time nor inclination to comb through every friend and change my settings for them.

Not only that, how could I know that ALL my friends would also be willing to do the same for me? It was like, the people at Facebook were TRYING to get me to waste more of my time there, adjusting and fixing everything, and getting comfortable with the new format.

And then it hit me. Right between the eyes.

YES! They WANT me to WASTE MY TIME hanging out on Facebook. 

But why? What do they care?

BECAUSE, the more time people STAY on Facebook, the more likely people are to click on an ad, (supporting their sponsors, which is how they earn money) or play a game where I spend money on non-existent items.

Guess what, folks? FACEBOOK IS THE NEW TELEVISION. Facebook keeps people distracted, busy, obsessed with doing NOTHING, all in the name of earning money. Sound familiar?

I used to think that Facebook was "The New Town Square," the place where "The Great Debate" was going on. I am now ashamed to say that I talked MANY people into joining Facebook using this argument.

But it's not true.

Does anyone really do any deep, meaningful thinking while they're on Facebook?

How about nurturing relationships--with those CLOSEST to us???

Does Facebook make our homes happier places?

Does it add to, or take away from, our family togetherness?

I think these are questions worth asking. And so I did.

And the answer I came to was that even though Facebook is an ego-boost for me, even though I enjoy yakking to everyone else in the world, and even though I've been able to stay in touch with many wonderful people, I find myself with a choice-- as my wonderful cousin-in-love ReNee put it-- between GOOD, BETTER, and BEST.

And today, I've chosen.

P.S.-- I will keep my blogs attached to my Facebook account, so that anyone who wants to know what's going on with me and mine can stay in touch. I have decided that the Blogosphere is really where "the Great Conversation" is happening, and I'll be working on my writing skills there. I would also love an e-mail from any of my friends and family, as well. You can always get in touch with me at libermama at gmail dot com. 



  1. So well said! ...and courageous! Hats off to you.

  2. A hearty AMEN sista! :) After I DELETED my personal FB one year ago (not deactivated), I later created a ghost account (with strict settings; no friends-it was a lonely place!) in order to make a blog page where people could follow my blog from their FB. I now have over 500 followers! (And I can't see anything of their posts except what they write on my page). This works great for me. I did however, begin using my personal account to facilitate a Good Morning Girls Bible study accountability group (with my husband's full approval). But I hide each person so I don't get drawn back in. Lame, I know; but I am not strong enough to resist the temptation. I'm proud of you for taking this giant step!

  3. I absolutely agree! I have "deactivated" and "reactivated" my account so many times. Right now it is "deactivated." Yeah!

    My biggest complaint is the HUGE waste of time. It takes so much time to make even the smallest connections (by the time you get done wading through TRASH). The huge sacrifice of time just isn't worth the tiny reward! I think it is nice just to FIND people, and read their profiles and look at photos when I first find them, and to update family photos every few months...

  4. Great thoughts, Rachel! Thanks for sharing.

  5. Woohoo! I've done the same... For the same reasons ;) good work!

  6. I've never gotten on FB or Twitter because I KNOW I've got the same addictive personality. It would just be bad.

  7. YEAH! I did it almost a year ago and DO NOT regret it one bit. FB is a huge time waster and the majority of stuff on there is not fit for my eyes. There is a much better spirit in our home since we blocked it on all our computers.

  8. You're my inspiration. I really need to take that leap and get rid of the time-suck that is the internet. I spend so much of my "me" time online and never truly come away feeling refreshed or uplifted. *sigh* Now to quit cold turkey...

  9. Thanks everyone! I'm working hard every day to better "behold my little ones".

    I don't know why it's so difficult sometimes, but I know I'm much happier, my children are better behaved, I get more writing done, and my house is cleaner when I stopped wasting so much time socializing!

    What's not love about that?! ;-D

  10. I wish I were that strong. My husband recently deleted his. I'm getting closer, though, and you are inspiring me.

  11. I get it....but I miss you. :)

    I think the reason I'm still ok is that I go through and delete friends. Fewer friends=less things to look at....I also don't have lots of kids :P

  12. Just as a point of interest, here's a link to a great article on the difference between REAL relationships and online "friendships." It's really worth checking out!


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