Where did the time go?
This is my baby. Well, my almost-eighteen month old baby. She has grown up so fast in the last few months!
Yes, I know I've been down this road a time or two, so it should be no surprise to me that babies grow. But with my oldest kids getting so big, I am finally understanding what wise mothers have been telling me for years; enjoy them while they're little!
The days do fly by too fast. *sniff*
Today, I am officially 38 weeks pregnant. In other words, I could "go at any moment!" But before anyone gets a panicked look on one's face as they back away slowly, take heart. I've never gone into labor on my own before the dreaded "due date."Frankly, I'm just not feeling "ready" to have this baby yet. I do have all my supplies ready and waiting, my bedroom is almost all organized and ready to go (with the exception of some laundry "dregs" that need to be put away), and I'm having all the lovely false labor that helps my body get ready.
But as far as my head goes...? I guess I still have a few things to work out. I'm not sure if I'm:
A) Feeling fear because labor hurts, and I hate feeling out of control there at the end,
B) Still in denial about not being finished with ten babies, like I thought I was,
C) Feeling overwhelmed at the thought of taking care of a newborn again, or
D) All of the above!
I think I'll have to go with "D".
I'm sure I'll eventually get my head straightened out, and then the baby will come, and everything will fall into place where it should be.
But for now, I'm puttering around, cursing due dates and creaking hips, and grinning each time the baby kicks.
And hugging baby #10, because soon, she'll be so grown up...
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I vote for D too! I'm 15 weeks along with #6 and my current baby is 15 months old. Sigh. The poor guy suspects something is up as my lap starts disappearing.
ReplyDeleteDuring my last pregnancy, I put off thinking about labor during the entire 9 months, telling myself, "I'll deal with it when the time comes." Those last two weeks I began to tackle the fear factor. My midwife assured me that fear is normal, especially in a woman who has had so many babies. But I disagreed. I explained to her that the Lord says, "God has not given us a spirit of fear..." So where does it come from? Fear is a spiritual battle. The Lord graciously gave me several verses to meditate on and I found Scripture mottos for the children to color for my birthday. I laminated these and hung them in the kitchen (where the baby would be born) to focus on during labor. I can honestly say that the victory was won! Throughout my 28-hour labor and during delivery (my most difficult birth), I WAS NOT AFRAID! I will be praying for you to experience this same victory, Rachel. :)
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to know that even a pro, such as yourself, still worries about taking care of a newborn again, and all the constant care it takes.
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